During this time, distractions are removed and we are left to truly know one’s self. Before this, the external world presented us with daily stressors that distracted us from ourselves as we just tried to make it through the day. Running to catch a bus, bundling up for a blustery day or fighting crowds of people often leaves one angry and weary. When we returned home we spent time shaking off the day with alcohol, food and the television; exhausted we fall into bed.
But now we have a chance to adjust to not having those distractions. Some may feel bored, …
As much as meeting in person is the preferred environment for most therapists and clients these unprecedented times call for unprecedented measures. Many people are feeling anxious and depressed due to feeling isolated, or restricted and confined with no means of distracting one’s self from their emotions.
Having a regular appointment where one can check in with a trusted professional can normalize many of the thoughts and feelings that arise during these times. If one lives alone, an
outside voice can make the inside voices seem to have a direction or purpose when explored in therapy. If you live with another person, …
With the holiday’s approaching, it can be a stressful and hectic time of the year. It can be difficult to manage all our responsibilities with a mix of shopping bags, rushing around, parties and merging of families and traditions. In the midst of the chaos, remember to give yourself permission to make choices. Don’t be afraid to say no to that holiday party you just can’t swing this year. Remember to time for yourself, be kind to yourself and make your needs a priority! Think about what you need to cut out this season in order to be the happier …
Understanding and relating to yourself doesn’t have to be based on uncomfortable feelings. Loving one’s self is about loving all the parts of ourselves; the parts we don’t like but also the parts that we enjoy. So do something fun with yourself. That could be watching your favorite show or making your favorite food. Think about how you would plan an outing with a friend or love interest and do the same for yourself. Sometimes just giving yourself permission to not do anything is the best way for you to enjoy yourself.
Would you like to talk? Get in touch …
In my practice, I often hear people tell me that they fear being alone. I often respond by saying that in reality, we are all alone since we are the only ones that can be in our experience. Think about it. You will be the only one who will experience your life from beginning to end. New meaning to the saying “love the one you’re with.”
Nowadays people will pay to go to a silent retreat, but that is something that is always available. Spend some time with yourself without any distractions; no tv, no phone, no computer. At first, it …
In the last blog, I mentioned complexes which tend to be created in our childhood. Imagine, a child that’s crying being told how annoying they are being. In that moment, the child learns that feelings alienate them from others and create a complex where emotions are best kept to oneself.
In our quest to have a relationship with one’s self, we need to reverse those beliefs by reparenting ourselves, which is relating to ourselves in a loving manner. The next time you’re sad, imagine you are a child (the child within you) and tell yourself that a part …
Have you been angry and then immediately felt guilty? Or have you felt sad but then stifled that sadness by feeling shame?
We often use the term secondary emotions to describe these feelings we have about initial automatic emotions.
Automatic emotions are triggered by unconscious stimulus, so we don’t have control over them, but we do have control over how we respond to them. Many times, the secondary response is a complex which was created a long time ago. An example of a complex would be that crying is for weak people or that anger will make people not like you.
Are you …
The one word that encompasses so much. From the experience of craving, yearning, and loss, to the experience of infatuation, desire, and deep vulnerability. With happiness, it’s the emotion that human beings strive for the most. But do we really know what the experience of love is? Or more specifically the “experiences”?
We often hear the phrase “love yourself” but how does one do that? First and foremost one must have a relationship with one’s self. Over the next few blogs, I will explore what that entails and how through loving one’s self we can learn to love others.
Since this is …
Living in a big city where you see so many people on a daily basis can be a bit overwhelming. So we put our headphones on, stare at our phones or shift our eyes down seeking protection in our own private world. We become numb in a sea of people. I am always struck by how many clients speak about loneliness in a city of millions of people.
So next time you’re walking to work or out in the city, pick your head up, put your phone away, and look at all the people. Notice the diversity in all the wonderful …
I remember an Oprah episode where she talks about the fact that one’s life is bigger than all the relatively brief challenges that we face. But we do at times get stuck in a certain moment of time when we lose that perspective and feel like the present moment will never end.
Think back to a difficult time you have had in the past reflecting on what your thoughts and emotions were at that time. Now think about what you’re thinking and feeling at this moment. Hopefully, it doesn’t feel as bad or as hopeless than it did at that time. …
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