Therapy makes you question your perception. What we see, or perceive, is based on how our brain contextualizes information; how it relates new information to what we’ve already experienced. We tend to look for things that are familiar, especially in terms of patterns that had previously caused us pain or anxiety.

I tend to see two patterns arise when our brain unconsciously processes past trauma. We go into anxiety mode where our emotions dictate our fight or flight response. We either fight these emotions or we run away, which is experienced as anger or avoidance of the situation.

We experience a complex, which is a group of thoughts that are limited in scope and try to resolve the issue the same way we had to in our childhood. Since we were less self-empowered as a child, and had limited experiences to draw from, these resolutions often don’t work today and cause us to misread situations.

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